The Enigma of Life Asides: Severus Snape
by Lady Moonwolf
Summary: He pulled out of her mind. Tears leaked again from her eyes as he gave her back control of her body. She pulled herself into a ball as he watched impassively. His memories had to match hers. It didn't matter if he was dying inside watching the aftermath of what he had done to her, even though he had never physically touched her. He couldn't show it. Dark fic. You've been warned


Disclaimer: I don't own anything Harry Potter related. Unfortunately it all belongs to Jo. I just like to play in her sandbox.

A/N: So, it's been a long time. I fear that I may be a bit rusty. But this story wouldn't leave me alone, so here I am. This is a little companion piece to something I wrote a long time ago, The Enigma of Life. If you haven't read it, I suggest doing so before you read this so that you can understand better what is going on. It's not available on this site due to content restrictions. You can read it on AO3 and adultfanfiction. My name on those sites is cullens_pet. A word of caution, this story is rated 'M' for a reason. While not described in detail, there is noncon in this story and some may find that unpleasant. If that type of story is not your cup of tea, look away now. Any who, I'll stop babbling. Enjoy.

The Enigma of Life Asides- Severus Snape

Severus apparated soundlessly into her chambers, feeling the squeeze of the wards that allowed him passage into her rooms. He did so very grudgingly. He harbored no romantic interest in the self righteous Gryffindor. She had been his student after all.

But that wasn't the only reason. He hated the fact that the girl was here at all. Her capture had been a mission that he hadn't been privy to. He'd been unable to warn the Order beforehand. Now the girl was well and truly trapped.

There was nothing that he could do to intervene.

And that fact bothered him quite a bit. It was true that he didn't particularly like the chit and she annoyed him to no end with her incessant hand waving in class, but she didn't deserve what was happening to her now.

No one did.

And he couldn't help but compare her to the one witch that had ever held his heart. That still held his heart. Even after all these years.

Lily.

Both muggleborns. Both extremely gifted witches. Both beautiful in their own way.

His dark eyes traveled over her still form. Miss Granger was asleep, but her rigid posture and the furrow on her brow suggested that it was anything but peaceful. But then, the girl had suffered so much that it was no small wonder that she had nightmares as she slumbered.

Her hair, once so bushy and out of control, fanned over her pillow in lank, wavy locks. It was darker than it had been in her adolescence, a rich mahogany brown instead of the honey tresses that she used to sport. But she hadn't been outside since the day she was captured, nearly three years ago.

Similarly, her complexion was more peaches and cream versus the sunkissed tan. Her skin was umblemished but she was starved for the light. Her body and her soul. Perhaps he could suggest to the Dark Lord that his pet needed some sun, that her health was suffering.

It sounded ridiculous, but Severus knew that the man had taken a very unnatural interest in the golden girl. For Salazar's sake, he'd attached her life to his own making her nearly immortal. He seemingly cared for the girl in his own sick and twisted way.

His eyes wandered over her face. She had good cheekbones, a pert little nose, and cupid's bow lips. She was attractive. It was a fact that even he couldn't deny. But her beauty did little to make him want to complete what he was here to do.

The Dark Lord's plans for the girl eluded him. Why have her violated over and over by his minions? Was it to break her? Was it to break Potter through their connection? Was it to get his own rocks off? He knew that man was capable of carnal acts, having forced himself on the girl weeks ago. Maybe he liked to watch? Maybe it was his way of keeping his Death Eaters in line? Whatever his reason, the only thing that Severus was sure of was that it was convoluted.

So, against his wishes, Severus was here in her chambers. Commanded to do the unthinkable by his master. Fortunately for him, the Dark Lord was otherwise occupied so he would have no audience as he completed the deed.

It also meant that he would be at liberty to not actually have to touch the girl. Despite being half blood, Severus was a gifted wizard. And magics of the mind were something that he excelled at.

He was adept at both Legilimancy and Occlumancy. But it didn't stop there. He was able to enter the mind and create false memories. So instead of just wiping the girl's mind, he could implant memories of things that had never happened. So, if the Dark Lord invaded her mind, he would see what Severus wanted him to see versus an empty canvas.

It's what had made him so successful at playing spy. He'd have been dead long before now if he hadn't mastered it.

He drifted forward as his eyes traced her curves. Miss Granger had developed into a lovely, young woman. It was such a waste. He had no doubt that if she was allowed to grow up and enter the world that she would have made her mark. With her talent, brains, and beauty, she would have been a force to be reckoned with.

She was certainly more capable than the other two thirds of the trio. But he didn't see a way out of this for her. The wards surrounding her could only be breached by a marked Death Eater or the Dark Lord himself. He'd branded her skin, placing a permanent tracking charm on her. He'd tied their lives to each other, so she couldn't escape him in death.

She was trapped.

And it saddened him.

He took a breath and shook the emotion away. Emotions were dangerous. They could get you killed.

He prepared himself mentally. Better get done with this before the Dark Lord did appear and force Severus into abandoning his previous plans.

Severus reached out to the girl and stroked her aura with his magic. He didn't want to touch her at all. Not even to rouse her from her rest.

She bolted upright, her eyes swinging wildly about the room in fear. His insides clenched to see her so broken down, so beaten. Outwardly, he was unflappable.

"Miss Granger," he intoned silkily.

Her hands clutched her blanket and brought it protectively to her chest as she covered herself the best that she could.

"Professor," she acknowledged softly.

He could nearly taste her fear. It was heavy in the room.

Her eyes were averted as he studied her silently. He could see the small tremors that racked her small body. He damned the Dark Lord to hell for the shell that this girl had become. It was a true tragedy.

"No doubt, you know why I'm here," he said quietly.

She looked up then, her frightened eyes boring into his own. "I know what to expect," she lashed out. "It's happened a good many times you know."

He did know.

"It doesn't have to this time," Severus explained, his voice a soft caress.

"It doesn't?" she asked hopefully.

"You've noticed our master is absent?"

She shook her head in reply.

"I can fabricate a memory of our time together Hermione. I can obliviate this conversation and replace it with what he wants to see. He wants me to invade your mind as I violate you. He's looking for information. He thinks that somehow the fact that it is me will trigger you to remember things about the Order."

"There is nothing there that he hasn't already seen Professor!" she cried. "We weren't privy the Order's secrets. You know that."

"I know," he soothed. "But the Dark Lord wants to end this. It's gone on much longer than he thought it would. Potter has gone into hiding, along with everyone else. As far as every thing goes, the Dark Lord has won. He has control over wizarding Britain. He wants to snuff out the existence of everyone that ever defied him."

"How long?" she asked suddenly.

"How long what?" he asked.

"How long have I been here?"

He swallowed. "A little over three years."

He watched as she digested the information. He couldn't fathom what was going on in her head.

She looked up suddenly. "Is there any way out?"

He regarded her for a moment. This was surely going to crush what was left of her.

"No," he said finally. "The wards are air tight. Only marked Death Eaters and the Dark Lord have access to this room. The mark on your back is a tracking beacon. He would find you even if you could flee. And you can't die."

"I know," she laughed bitterly as she traced the thin scars on her wrists. "But he can die."

"No, he can't Miss Granger," he replied.

"Sure he can," she answered as she swung her legs off the bed.

Severus watched distractedly as she paced the room, her nightgown didn't even cover her properly.

"How?" he asked finally.

"Dumbledore said that you were skilled at Legilimancy," she explained. "I want you to invade my mind. There was a mission that Harry, Ron, and I were going to go on after Bill and Fleur's wedding. I don't remember the details as they wiped them just in case we were captured. We were going to meet at the wedding and have the memories restored. That memory is the key to destroying him once and for all."

He eyed her uncertainly. "You do realize that if he dies then you die?"

"Yes," she whispered. "But this is no life. It's not even a half life. And if I get to play the smallest part in his down fall then it is a victory."

He wrestled with himself for a minute, weighing the pros and the cons. He would have to occlude whatever he found. And he doesn't know what to do with the information once he has it. He didn't want to live like this either. He didn't want to be a Death Eater any more either.

"Sit down," he instructed.

She did as he asked, sitting on the edge of the bed. He moved the one chair in the room so that he was across form her.

"Are you ready?"

She nodded her head, her eyes connecting with his.

"Legilimens," he whispered.

He recoiled in horror as he entered her mind. So many scenes and scenarios that were disturbing on every level. Each one seemed more horrifying than the last. Times with Lucius and Bella. And his own fabricated encounter. This was the second time that he'd been commanded to violate the girl. Luck had been with him both times.

He traveled deeper. There was her fight with Lucius and Rodolphus the day that she was captured. He admired her spunk. She had nearly beaten the two skilled wizards. A little more experience and they would not have won that battle.

There was the missive requiring her presence at the wedding and Order meeting afterward. He dug deeper. He heard her moan of pain and knew that he was hurting her. It couldn't be helped. He was in her subconscience now. And the information that he was looking for had been wiped.

There.

There it was. The blank piece of her memories. He was surprised that they had never noticed before. Lucius and the Dark Lord had been in her mind several times looking for information.

He pushed with his mind hard, breaking through the wall of fog that shrouded the memory. He recognized Dumbledore's magic instantly. And it seemed that it recognized him as well.

"Severus," he greeted as he emerged from darkness.

"Albus," he said shocked.

The man smiled at him. "I had hoped that there would be no need for my contingency plan, but here you are."

"..." Severus was stumped. This was a magic even beyond his own.

"It's okay Severus. But now that you're here, I can only assume that the worst has happened. Harry has failed."

"No," Severus corrected him. "Not failed. The Dark Lord outmanuevered the trio. He tied Miss Granger's life to his. Harry cannot kill him without killing her as well."

"Love," Dumbledore stated knowingly.

"The Dark Lord believes so," he answered.

Dumbledore nodded his head sagely. "She knew the risks Severus."

"She understands," he explained. "It is Potter that hesitates. The Order has gone underground but the Dark Lord is killing them off one by one."

"There is a way to kill him," Albus explained. "Tell me Severus, have you heard of a horcrux?"

"Magic most evil," he answered. "He's done it?"

"Seven times," Albus corrected.

"Seven?" he exclaimed astonished. No wonder the man was so unhinged. He's not even human any more.

"Destroy the horcruxes and then you can destroy the man. That was the mission Severus. The trio was to destroy the pieces of Voldemort's soul and end the war."

"They were children Albus!" Severus thundered. "Why would you entrust this to them?"

"They were capable and not likely to arouse the madman's suspicion. We just didn't realize how desperate they were to separate the trio. We should have had better security for Miss Granger."

Severus glared at the man. He had forgotten what a manipulator Albus was.

"What are they?" he asked.

"The Gaunt family ring that I destroyed. The diary that Harry destroyed his second year. Slytherin's locket that Harry and I tried to retrieve before I died. It was a fake. So that one is still out there."

"What else?" Severus asked.

"I believe that Hufflepuff's cup and Ravenclaw's diadem are two. Nagini." Albus answered.

"And the last," Severus queried.

"Harry," Albus whispered.

"Potter," Severus reared back in shock. "You mean..."

"Yes," Albus nodded sadly. Harry will have to die before Voldemort can be killed."

"Does he know this?" Severus asked.

"No."

Severus was again at a loss for words. How the hell was Potter ever supposed to figure all this out? They were set up for failure from the start. It would have been nothing short of a miracle if the trio could have pulled all this off.

"Find them Severus. Find the horcruxes and destroy them. Find Harry. Let him know everything. Put a stop to the reign of terror," Albus urged before he faded away, leaving nothing but a swirl of smoke in his place.

Severus dropped out of the girl's mind, gently wiping her tears with a handkerchief before he sat back. His mind was reeling from everything that had been revealed.

"Did you get what you needed?" she sniffed as more tears leaked from her brown eyes. He knew that her head hurt. His own temples were throbbing.

"Yes."

She nodded her head, and wiped her face.

"We are not done however," he drawled. "I must implant that memory before I go. It would be unwise to arouse his suspicion."

She nodded her head and looked once again into his eyes.

"Legilimens," he hissed.

He forced her body into the correct position and vanished her clothes. He sliced out the entirety of their conversation. Then he replaced it with him. He placed her face down on the bed, on her knees in front of him. He held her there with magic as he forced himself into her time and again. He added tears and cries, and finally quiet acceptance as he took his pleasure from her. In her mind, he climaxed and left her pinned into place as he cleaned himself up and redressed. Then, while she was still pinned into place, he entered her mind, raping it in much the same way that he raped her just moments before. He shuffled through her terrible memories, lingering on the encounter with the Dark Lord for good measure.

He pulled out of her mind. Tears leaked again from her eyes as he gave her back control of her body. She pulled herself into a ball as he watched impassively. His memories had to match hers. It didn't matter if he was dying inside watching the aftermath of what he had done to her, even though he had never physically touched her. He couldn't show it.

He straightened his robes and acknowledged her once more.

"Miss Granger."

She shuddered and wrapped herself tighter as he apparated straight back to his house at Spinner's End. He was in dire need of a drink. And he needed to figure out what his next move was going to be. It looked like the role of hero was going to fall to him.

And it was an unlikely role indeed.

End Note: Thoughts? I was deeply saddened by Alan Rickman's death. This was strangely therapeutic to write. I do hope you enjoyed it.


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